-By A Special Correspondent
(Lanka-e-News -28.May.2025, 11.00 PM) In yet another episode of Sri Lanka’s favourite political soap opera, Sajith Premadasa, Leader of the Opposition and full-time political damage controller, has fiercely denied claims that he begged Imtiaz Bakeer Markar to return as Chairman of the Samagi Jana Balawegaya (SJB).
According to diplomatic circles with nothing better to gossip about than Sri Lanka’s internal political punch-ups, Sajith allegedly made a quiet pilgrimage to Imtiaz’s house — presumably without the white flag — and requested him to return to the post he once held with all the grace of a revolving door.
But when asked, Premadasa's response was firmer than expired Milkmaid:
“Imtiaz? Back? To SJB? I’d rather appoint a Colombo tuk-tuk meter as party chairman. At least it knows when to stop.”
The denial came during a private conversation with a well-known diplomat, who later spilled the beans quicker than a Budget leak. Premadasa reportedly said Imtiaz was “a political cancer” and “a drama artist who moonlights as a memoir writer but couldn’t win a preferential vote if it was raffled at a wedding.”
The real zinger? Sajith allegedly declared:
“Imtiaz should consider a more appropriate role – like VAT consultant in Alhambra Street – preferably under a signboard that reads: 'Formerly Chairman, Currently Expert in Refunds (Especially Illegal Ones)'.”
This verbal Molotov cocktail seems to stem from long-standing animosity, dating back to Imtiaz's involvement — or alleged adjacency — to what has been described in local lore as “South-East Asia’s most ambitious Value Added Scam.”
While Imtiaz has never been convicted, the same cannot be said for certain extended family members who, according to airport intel, are on more watchlists than a Netflix thriller.
The feud reportedly escalated after Imtiaz clapped back with the classic political tu quoque: “Well, Sajith, you also inherited your position from your dad.”
This, apparently, struck a nerve deep enough to make the late Ranasinghe Premadasa rise from his grave for a rebuttal.
Sajith, clearly stung, responded with poetic venom:
“Just because someone can write 400 pages about their failure doesn’t mean they deserve a chairmanship. Imtiaz writes like Tolstoy, but politically functions like a broken light switch – mostly flickering, rarely useful.”
According to insiders, Premadasa is now looking to appoint firebrand Mujibur Rahman to the vacant chairmanship. Party loyalists describe Mujibur as a man with “the political subtlety of a bullhorn and the humility of a Colombo three-wheeler driver in peak traffic.”
Still, to many in the SJB, that sounds like just the right dosage of chaos.
When contacted for comment, Imtiaz Bakeer Markar declined to give a statement but was spotted browsing office space near Inland Revenue with a suspiciously confident smile. Whether he’s opening a VAT advisory or penning Volume II: “The Man Who Wasn’t Invited Back” remains unclear.
Political analysts say this saga illustrates the SJB’s real strength — an ability to spend more time fighting over titles than fighting elections.
A retired UNP strategist quipped:
“Frankly, if Sajith and Imtiaz went on ‘The Voice,’ both would be eliminated at auditions – one can’t lead, the other can’t listen.”
But perhaps Sajith Premadasa put it best when he allegedly told the diplomat:
“If the SJB is a ship, Imtiaz is the barnacle. And this time, I’m scraping the hull.”
The Sri Lankan public, exhausted by decades of nepotism, theatrical resignations, and imaginative corruption, are reportedly enjoying this sideshow with popcorn in hand.
Meanwhile, the Inland Revenue Department has refused to comment on whether Mr. Bakeer Markar is eligible for a consultancy post — although, according to sources, someone did Google "How to start a VAT refund centre in Sri Lanka" from a UN office- Wi-Fi connection.
-By A Special Correspondent
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by (2025-05-28 23:12:12)
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